There is so much information on love, dating & relationships available it is hard to imagine anyone totally lost when it comes to the subject of LOVE!
There are #1 New York Times bestselling author’s that wrote some interesting and informative books on the subject such as,
· John Gray’s – Mars & Venus on a DATE
· Greg Behrendt & Amiira Ruotola’s – He’s Just Not That into You!
· Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townson’s – Boundaries in Dating!
· Psychologist, George S. Pransky’s – The Relationship Handbook!
Then, of course, there is the famous Patti Stanger, ‘The Millionaire Matchmaker.’ An experienced third-generation matchmaker who wrote a few books of her own!
We have been so fortunate a society to be so overwhelmed by all this expert advice! Yet, it has only been since the advancement of modern research on the human brain that we now have better insight and much more of an understanding as to how and why we fall in love.
In fact, this new research tells us that we are innately and biologically designed to love and be loved, regardless of our psychological makeup and how educated we are about love.
The truth is that nature could care less how much we know or don’t know about love or if we have personal issues such as low self-esteem or that we bring into another relationship a lot of personal baggage. Even taking the time necessary to examine our previous relationship patterns makes no difference. We, humans, were purposely designed to bond & mate, and if young enough, to procreate!
As a dating consultant for the past 15 years, I’ve heard and seen it all. My experience as taught me the one most important thing about modern dating and that is even though we are designed to love and be loved, most single people today do not know HOW to date!
From first gaining the attention of a desirable prospect to keeping that attention long enough for romance to blossom has become nothing more than an oxymoron to people of all ages, backgrounds & lifestyles! My enormous success as a dating expert is due to this very reason.
My work first begins by teaching my client’s several important things:
· How to gain attention online & off!
· How to keep prospects continually engaged!
· How to recognize a high-quality match!
· How to represent yourself also as a high-quality match!
· How to maintain self-control!
The fact is men and women are complete opposites when it comes to dating. My job as a dating consultant is to explain these differences, so I painstakingly take the time to teach my clients the differences between the sexes both innately & biologically. This allows them to understand how each sex dates and looks at relationships in a much different way.
For example, did you know that men are autonomous physical beings and so that is how they like to date, in an independent and at times a very physical way, while women are bonding emotional beings and so they date for the sole purpose of finding a mate?
Another challenge that often presents itself is clients who basically feel inadequate and don’t feel good about themselves physically or otherwise. Their biggest complaint is that they never meet anyone socially or that no one bothers to notice them.
So sometimes it is wise to consider self-improvement! Why? Well, for one thing, we live in an era where our overall health and appearance seems to take second or third place in our everyday lives. How is this happening?
We consume processed foods that are all high glycemic. These carbohydrates don’t digest well in our body so our body converts it to fat! Let’s face it, very few of us feel confident enough dating while we are feeling those extra pounds!
This uncomfortable physical self-awareness presents itself in our overall attitude around others, especially while on a date. Often sending the wrong signals such as your date feeling that you are uncomfortable being around them.
Another big problem is that we mainly dress in, generic wash & wear such as jeans, t-shirts & sweat wear clothing and then we go out and socialize in what has become known as CLONING ATTIRE ENVIRONMENTS! These types of environments make everyone blend in not stand out. So how is anyone going to notice your personal visual uniqueness? Therefore, you never get noticed in the first place.
When I first present these issues to clients they often react puzzled and confused. I then get questions as to why one’s health and appearance, how one chooses to dress or where they socialize should make a difference as to whether they find love or not.
Hence a few of the many reasons as to why today’s singles do not know how to date. Yet, once I begin to work with them on their dating issues they begin to see things in a whole new light.
Believe me, nature allows for dating and falling in love as anything but complicated. Once you take complicated out of the equation altogether, dating becomes as natural a process as anything else we endeavor to do as loving & caring human beings!
Linda Jean Runstein is a Certified Professional Dating & Personal Image Coach, Love Science Mentor, Consultant, Author & Public Speaker. Nationally recognized as a phenomenal dating expert, Ms. Runstein was voted by her peers as America’s # One Dating Genius for her straight forward, insightful, perceptive & ingenious dating advice for the past 15 years! Visit her website at lindarunstein.com